Karma?

My son came home from work this morning and told his little brother, "Karma. It's karma. I've been trying to arrange things, trying to figure out what to do and the money just showed up." He asked me, "Isn't it amazing how these things work out?"
I need to look up karma; I've heard the word of course, but I realize I don't actually know what it means. Isn't it pretty much the Indian version of "you get what you give", "what goes around comes around" and the biblical mandate to "do these things that it will go well with you"?

So we're covered for another month of rent and the car is inspected and registered. No insurance yet, and bills aren't paid but I guess that will come too.

Maybe Meaning or Maybe Just The Vagaries of Life

Life can get so depressing and it's all about money. Not all bad things are about money, of course, I know that quite well. But right now I have overdue rent, no job, a car overdue to be inspected, registered, and insured, no food. We're turning off the phone and the cable, sold the TV, I would advertise other things to sell but have no money to buy an ad!
I called to find out the status of the last job application I put in - the woman told me she had been out of town and would be again so she hasn't reviewed any of them yet. Then I even called to find out if I can go back to psycho land (the job I quit because of the scary people and stalkers!) and they have no openings.
AND THEN I got a speeding ticket that isn't legit. I've never refuted one before because I used to speed but this time I wasn't. My son and I had JUST been discussing why we had to go so slowly; I showed him that we had been in a school zone and the limit was only 20 mph. We still drove slowly because we had a flat tire and had just inflated it, we were checking it to see if it would hold or had to be repaired. That's when a cop stopped us for speeding! Nope, sorry, you're wrong buddy. My son even suggested I call "the real police to let them know about these men out here and what they're doing"! LOL!
Sometimes it would be easier to not know God at all, then I wouldn't be looking for some deep meaning behind all this. Nothing would be better but I wouldn't be trying to figure out if there was something I needed to learn or do, or if I had done something horribly wrong.

Made for the Butterfly Effect?

I wonder how it would be if we are here for one specific purpose. I know it's not quite like this and I've mentioned this before, but what if one's reason for living is to do one specific thing or help one specific person? Anything else would be "icing on the cake".

So then, what would happen if you didn't do it -- if you weren't sure you should, thought you didn't have time, didn't know how, or thought it was your own mind coming up with ideas? Maybe you just didn't want to. Would the Father send someone else along to do it instead? Would it be left undone?

We have to stay so close, so connected to the source that we KNOW. But if we're not that close, will we realize it? Some beg to know God but He doesn't reveal Himself to them (or not for a very long time). Some think they DO know Him and don't find out until later that they hadn't after all. I assume some truly did know truth, but life destroys them to the point where it doesn't matter and they don't care anymore.


Sometimes this bothers me, often though, it strikes me as funny to think my whole purpose in living (or any one person's), could be to have a particular life story to tell a particular person at one point in their life. All the rest would be superfluous expenditure of energy. Perhaps life is full of Butterfly Effects.

All Things Work Together For The Good Of...

Once again, what is it we trust God for? I don't mean why, I mean for what. We trust that all things will be worked out for our good but is that our own specific particular good or for the good of the human race as a whole, or believers as a whole? Because it seems a bit presumptuous and extreme to assume it means my good. It could be but what if what's good for me is bad for someone else? Or will it never turn out that way in the long run? And do we assume that staying alive is best? Are there no believers who have starved to death or frozen to death because they have nowhere to live even while they trusted God for things to work out for their good? Yeshua himself trusted YHWH for his good, it certainly wasn't his good in THIS life - betrayed, abandoned, ridiculed, tortured and murdered. The Father's approbation was his reward, I wonder if he 'looks down' at us and thinks, "Yes, they're worth what I went through for them."

If things fall to pieces and are really bad, is it because we're not seeking the kingdom of God first? Or are we simply meant to learn a lesson, see something, change something? All of them can be true but I don't know how to tell the difference; if I'm wrong about what's going on, my energies are aimed in the wrong direction. I have the book Secret of The Vine, I think that deals with this question, I need to read it again.

Now I Get It

Maybe it's not that we should be seeing people as our Maker
intended us to be
but how He intends us to be.

Unexpectedly Ended Up At Church Today

This morning I was looking for a nearby church to go to, the one I tried a couple of times is too far. I found one listed in the phone book that was close but it didn't have any starting times. Knowing this would be like all the other times that I just didn't bother, I drove to the corner store but instead of going in, I decided to go to the bookstore, dangerous idea, no need and no right to spend money but I could browse and enjoy myself for a while. Half an hour to sit in the parking lot until they opened so I decided to look up that church I had found listed. I arrived at the exact right time to attend! BUT I was wearing corduroys and a sweatshirt; I hadn't planned on actually making it to church. Then I saw a family going in, the kids were wearing jeans. Then the dad - jeans. Then the mom, jeans. Then another family, jeans and/or other casual clothes. So I went in and I'm glad I did.
It's very small, 30 people? 50? 60? I don't estimate very well so I don't know but it's definitely small. It's okay though because the spirit of the Holy One was there. These people weren't there for entertainment and they weren't there to show themselves as "good church people" either. (Not that people care about the latter anymore that I know of.) It was the perfect place to be this morning; if I hadn't left the coffee pot on and almost empty when I made "a quick drive down to the corner" and then been gone for over two hours, I would have stayed and talked to people afterward! Yah willing, there's always next time.

Dean Koontz and Spiritual Quests

Every time I read a Dean Koontz novel, I'm surprised at how much I enjoy it. I've never been one for horror, I don't read that type of book or ever watch movies like that. But his books always include so much spiritual searching, contemplation, and at times insight that I can't help but be fascinated.
Many deal with the depravity and insanity of human behavior, every book involves a wonderful and gentle man, the epitome of kindness, and a woman who is noble and full of love. They are coupled as so in love that neither can imagine breaking the bond because who breaks their own life and the perfection of unity in their wedded love? They always step up in self-sacrifice to deal with whatever horror (and this man can come up with truly horrible horrors) threatens.
I just finished one that was truly awful called Hideaway, it explores the nature of evil in humans and its source - no 'answers' really but his characters don't have the whole answer any more than we do now. Koontz as an author seems to think about this a lot, wondering why, WHY would anyone be like that?
The other one I just read is The Taking, an apocalyptic story that was really very good. Totally wonderful. Freaky, creepy, spiritual, triumph of God over all. I think what I like about him is that he's a man who obviously spends much time contemplating the spiritual aspect of life.