Universal Reconciliation? Free Will?

Up to a couple of weeks ago, I participated as an annoying person yelling my contributions from the sidelines of a forum discussion concerning Universal Reconciliation. Apparently this is an idea that has several different forms. Detractors, of course, were accusing all supporters of deliberately trying to subvert the gospel, working for satan, and being false prophets. That may be part of the reason the whole idea attracted me - whenever people get irate and no longer show the "fruit" of love, I start wondering if the most vehement supporters of the status quo are mostly fighting from the flesh.
In this case, the main proponent was arguing and fighting the same way; belittling his opponents, offering to pray that the Father would open their eyes to truth so they would no longer be angry. One of the other "universalists" said what she felt she needed to say, came back a couple of times, then just stayed out of it unless clarification was needed for others reading along that didn't get involved.
I didn't stay in very long, only said a couple of things because I don't know enough about it.

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The main problem I see is that scripture DOES teach that all will be reconciled to the Father in the end, the Son offered himself as a sacrifice and covered ALL sin, death and suffering will end.
Why is that a problem?
Scripture also teaches that we have free will, a choice of whether or not we "allow" that payment be made to cover us. It also teaches that there is eternal punishment.

Some people believe that unrepentant sinners will be burning throughout eternity in a fiery hell. Some believe that unrepentant sinners will burn up in hell.
What then is death?
Probably all those who are "in hell" burn up and exist no more. Then AFTERWARD death is destroyed. That wouldn't require anyone to stop being dead, the life is gone, the breath of life that animated their being would be returned to the Creator who gave it.

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What about those mentioned in Revelation who are outside the city? The ones who loved a lie, the sorcerers, the idolators, the perverts? Why are they still around?
Someone on the forum I originally referred to gave a timeline that helps with this but I can't keep it straight yet. I have trouble keeping the timeline of American history straight and I have a timeline on my wall! This one may take some thinking. Since I keep my sabbath from the evening of the sixth day through the seventh day (Fri night through until Sat night), this is the perfect time to study.