Saturday, August 30, 2008

Decisions and Being Temporary

If God does not have a specific plan for each person's life, we are free and responsible to make our own decisions. What does that mean then, that we have to be wise and figure it all out ourselves? I don't particularly like the idea - I don't know the future, can't really know what is the best course to take, the best job, the best school for my son, where I should live. Being given the freedom and responsibility without also being given the knowledge and information necessary is a frightening prospect!
I was thinking about this a lot. The wisdom we are to use comes from God in the first place, it's the wisdom he promises us but is that only about spiritual things? We also have to remember that He does work all things together for good for those who love Him and that He has called according to His purpose. Does that mean He's working things out for good only in those specific instances where we've been "called for a purpose"? Or does it mean those who have been called and that everyone has? Not all things work out for the good for everyone and there would be no need to write such a verse specifying for whom things will work out if it applied to everyone.

Sometimes not being "told" exactly what to do in every situation feels like being neglected. But my son is like this, he wants to be given every detail of what is said, done, meant, and then for someone else to make all decisions for him. It drives me crazy so I figure I drive God crazy being that way too. It feels different sometimes because my attitude toward my son's indecision in some of the things he asks is, "Who cares? I don't care! Do whatever you want and if you can't tell what you want, don't do either." I've always been taught that God cares about EVERY thing we do and think (Rev ... every thought will be called into judgment) so does He give input on some of these decisions and I just didn't hear? I'm not sure why this matters so much to me right now, I have no decisions to make other than general life things like keep this job or look for another; move again because I like to, keep D in school or bring him back home. Nothing important. Yes, our whole lives but if we change nothing, we're fine. I love the temporariness of moving a lot and changing jobs. Hopefully I'm one the Father uses to say something needful in a person's life or show someone something and then I'm "moved on" to my next mission. I like the idea of being placed somewhere simply to help a particular person who may influence many others just because of what the Father had me do in His perfect timing. I think I wish I were an angel, showing up to reveal the Father to people on earth and then be gone - leaving them in wonder at the wonderful love and provision of our heavenly Father. I've liked that idea for years.

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